02 March 2006

Four, Three, Two, One

Once there were Four. A happy Four. A well matched Four.

Four that were divided directly in half by ten years. Tens years did not matter though because what this Four shared were the same. The same shitty childhoods. The same search for a higher being. The same appreciation of laughter. The same sort of mistakes through life that makes a number. A real number. Number One brought laughter. Number Two brought a laid back and "whatever" attitude that was the envy of all around her. Number Three brought compassion and unconditional love. Number Four brought a motherly quality but never knew what else because it is hard to see from the inside out.

But this Four was not meant to be. One day Number One informed number Two, Three, and Four that this endeavor was not working anymore and she was moving on to greener pastures. Two, Three and Four were confused and of course turned it into the "breakup of all times" joke but tried to move on, growing closer together. Two, Three and Four had the time of their lives for a while. They laughed more than most do in a life time. They were their for each other when no one else could be. This threesome took adventures and did things that could only be enjoyed by such kindred spirits.

Then as it would happen Number Two became very unhappy with Three and Four and took her toys to play else were for a very long time. Leaving Three and Four to put up "Have you seen this missing number?" posters on trees and milk cartons.

That left Three and Four feeling devastated. It had been established at the beginning that this was a bruised and broken bunch of numbers. And the sudden departure of One and Two left Three and Four crumpled on the floor holding on to each other like mad, trying to find their happy place. They did. And at times it appeared this two would NEVER be torn apart

But then came the time that Three would ask Four a question and demand a honest answer. Number Four who made it a practice to keep certain things to herself, especially things that could be potentially hurtful, was not comfortable with this situation but went against her better judgment and answered the way number Three ask her to. Well all seemed fine for a while but then Number Three started to pull away. Overtime the bond that held these two was so stretched it looked like the fine strands of a spider web. Almost invisible to the naked eye. It was being held together by promises and hope. Promises of always being and the hope that it would.

Three and Four still cling to each other but they both have changed. Changed from the resolve that the Four will never be again, changed from the bruises it caused when it crashed, and changed as those do when they have to many broken pieces.

One and Two still have a relationship. Three and Four still hold desperately to theirs. Two has come back around to the delight of Three and Four. At times it almost feels like it used to except for that nagging feeling reminding Three and Four how fragile such things are. Making them get out the kid glove and handle with care because they have already seen how easily broken precious things are.


Most will not understand a damn word that was just written but to those who do don'’t over analyze. Just the ramblings of a sleepless number trying to find meaning and direction her life.


Number Three said...

I love you.

And I am crying.

I have to go call you now.

Number Three Again said...

please realize that I haven't pulled away from you..

I have pulled away from everyone.

I know it isn't right. But this number is just as scared and as fucked up as she ever was.

The question and the answer session at B.A.M. is what you are referring too, right? You never said anything.. I pulled the words out of your mouth without your permission. I know you and I can see it in your eyes. Words didn't even matter.

When you are friends with someone and as close as we are... words can be unnecessary.

Number Four said...

Keep talking and someone is going to see through your number diguise. In fact I have on my xray goggles now and I see your zoro's. Ooooh baby, that is some pair of 00's.

Four said...

your Zero's not your Zoro's. Geez!

RitaPita said...

no, no.. Zoro is almost there...

its The Zorros.


Three, Number Three.. double O zero. Shakin', not stirred.

God. I am slap happy after all that damn Jon Stewart on my telly.

Weepy Number Three said...

because they have already seen how easily broken precious things are.


Crying again.

Must regain my anon status. And I TOLD you.. 20 comments.

pam said...

Numero uno present and accounted for.I am currently in school.I have resolved that I will never be someones mom so I am embarking on a happier me.I told frank to tell you hi.

HotMama said...

Hi ya Pam,

Pam Frank did tell me you said Hi.

He also told me to tell you are wrong. You will be Von's mom forever...lol.

Yeah and the school thing. I am so proud of you. You are going to be good so GOOD at that and Mak sooooo much money because of it. Let me know when you are ready because I will be one of the ones giving you money for your services.

Gross, that sounded so dirty. sorry but you know what I mean.

number 2 said...

number 1 and number 2 watch number 3 and number 4 like hawks via blog. number two is throwing number 4 a shower and number 3 and number 1 will be there. i'm sorry number 3 and 4 have felt alone. it makes me sad and at the same time it was number 3 and 4 who left also. so maybe we are all even? i hope so. i love you number 1, 3 and 4!!!!!!!!!!
"envy of all"...you are such a terd!

HotMama said...

Nuber two,

That was a good comment to wake up to. Thanks, I needed that. See my point exactly there are just some things that number 1,2, and 3 would know!

You guys are all great and you know it. It does not matter where in the world you are and what you are doing you will always have the admiration of number four!